Metal Slut Waifus and I: How the Waifus aren't the Main Problem of MSA

art done by BlueSquirrel 23

Since SNK came out with a new character as part of the update for that piece of ass Metal Slug Attack game (of which maybe I should just keep calling it "Metal Slug Ass-tack"...and I'll get to my gripe with SNK shilling it later on), and that plenty of people are getting frustrated about the "waifus" that the game is getting recently, I'd figure I'd put my two cents into this issue. And let me tell you as a bit of a spoiler, they aren't the main problem but a symptom of a bigger problem...

Now before I begin, let us go back to the time the first update for MSA came out, the one that had some new characters come out. Mind you I have long advocated for having new charas ever since I was a teenager falling in love with the franchise in the 2000's (long before that asscrap digital ghetto came out). Why you may ask? because to quote one of the MS designers, "it...would be good to [expand] the [Metal Slug universe] by focusing on other characters living [there] or creating more about the background and motivation of [the] main characters" and indeed having more new characters or at least more into the backstories of established ones would be one good way to bring depth into the mythos of a franchise that just hasn't done much since its inception. Seeing the newbies in question appear in Ass-tack made me somewhat bittersweet in that at least the game of which I detested had a few redeeming qualities, along with having Another Story of which I'll consider that the "campaign" mode of the game (and I'll get to that later on). However since then, the new characters have gotten disproportionately more and more female and more fanservicey as hell; not that I find that combination bad but it is a problem when the recent these days are almost entirely just that and no new male ones just recolors of previous units (and that something thousand Taro guy). Granted the gals in question have interesting backstories and whatnot, especially Shizuka and her taste in sweets, Jin the swordswoman having connections to her and Yoshino, both of which are part of the enemy factions, Destrade, the Zarya looking gal having a kind of "parental" relationship with Allen, and Dragunov's relations with her COs but the fact that they show more skin than necessary can be somewhat annoying to see even for someone like me. Yet part of why this is so can be summed up in one sentence: sex sells. And I'm pretty sure you know that already, I mean what else there can be for someone who are sexually attracted to women to get behind when it comes to the "waifus"? I wouldn't mind them in such a state if their "stripperrific" selves are like an alternate costume that can be somewhat more powerful yet fun to use (and troll players in PVP battles), yet that's not the case. In fact, it's safe to say that the waifus are also part of SNK Moneymore's strategy of unwisely continuing to prop up this not so decent game along with using microtransactions.

I make no secret I despise this game, since while it feels like it can be pretty decent at times (with the mechanics being actually alright despite being simple looking), it's infested with this gacha microtransaction nonsense that a lot of mobile games have for the reason of greed...and hurts the game, big time. I mean, I couldn't beat the first Another Story campaign (the one where you take the side of the PF squad and fight against the Martians) at all without having to either grind or buy stuff for a more tougher and appropriate unit with real money, same goes for a couple of battles outside of AS and that the grinding part throughout the game feels off and artificially tedious, especially with the fact that it would take a long time to get many of your units to higher levels, more stars, and better "frames".

It's not like Metal Gear 7/Solid 5: the Phantom Pain where (while it has microtransactions, it only thankfully applies to multiplayer and presumably not as intrusive) at least you can grind to get more items and equipment to take on more difficult assignments and get more enjoyment from replaying previous missions, all without the bullcrap that are "sorties", "medals", and "cranks". All those (as of this writing) 177 hours of game play took nothing but brains, guts, hands, controller, skill, and in some cases a strategy book from Piggyback and luck. In MSA, I didn't even pay one cent, NOT one CENT, for anything, and while I have plenty of units to my knowledge (mainly through cranks), I have to spend a lot of MSPs on leveling them up and that I have yet to get more powerful units and more stuff to upgrade them, all while accounting for frames which make a difference despite having two units be at the same level when at different frames and those star things which again effect the battle. I'm pretty sure other people can explain this better but to sum this all up, all those frames and stars needlessly complicate the game and I could have beaten not only more stages but also a few AS campaigns; same goes for improving my experience if we have like a kind of system to buy units without this multiple currency type nonsense and crank s--t. And I know some may argue that the microtransactions are "merely optional" and that I can just grind my way through the game; but I just can't since it would take a long ass time for me to get my units strong and considering that I have many games to play (and replay for some), it's not worth my time and that again the game is rigged to entice you to get the mircotransactions just to win battles. There's a quote from ReviewTechUSA about this kind of stupidity, "spending money to beat a video game or have an advantage in a video game isn't playing it" and indeed it defeats the purpose of playing games to enjoy them, I play games for the sake of it and not to worry about spending my hard earned money on stuff I rather grind to get (I know that you have to spend money in an arcade game but that doesn't count) ingame.

Here's a good video by Yong Yea that highlights how this microtransaction garbage can ruin an otherwise decent game:

Now granted it might not have anything to do with MSA, but I can't help but connect it to my experiences with said game. As for me, I gave up on the game (quite rightly I add) after almost a month of pondering whether or not to keep playing it and decided it wasn't worth it. Sadly a lot of players still stuck with playing this crap but hey that's their decision, a stupid one IMO. The least they can do is point out the Lickboot-ite s--t SNK pulls off on Reddit, but again it won't change the fact that SNK basically got away with this (let's face it) scam and will continue to keep milking it for the foreseeable future, much to the detriment of the franchise's dignity (and no the newbies and the Another Story mode just won't save the game IMO, the damage is already done). It doesn't matter if the game was alright before said waifus came, what matters is that it's on mobile, has microtransactions, and is rigged to get you to use them to get ahead in the game. I mean I can accept that it reuses much of the sprites from previous games along with the soundtrack (thought the SFX are messed up for some reason), but one that has the kind of stuff that takes longer than usual to get plenty of strong units (and leveling them) and a form of limiting your turns via "sorties" when you can just not have them is quite a deal breaker for me.

And honestly I don't want this damn game existing anymore and I have frankly had it, like enough is enough. At this point I just want it shut down, SOON. Like maybe at the end of the year soon; why? because SNK ain't going to fix it anytime and it's getting on my nerves. Some of you may say that I can just "ignore" it but I can't, it's the only thing in the franchise that's being kept relevant and frequently infesting not only the MS wiki but also my Google searches. Also I don't want an MS8, just nope; trying to be like the arcade games (the way MS7 and XX did) didn't work then and it wouldn't work now and people who advocate for them are frankly IMO naïve and misguided. At this point a reboot of the franchise is necessary IMO, one that would ditch being sprite based and maybe arcade like but not a lot of people are going to like that but I don't give a damn.

But anyway, to sum this all up, the waifus being sometimes stripperific can be somewhat odd, at least are somewhat interesting to have in the lore of the franchise's mythos, they are unfortunately part of SNK's ways to get suckers into playing Ass-tack and frankly, I can see through it and I would suggest you do too.

Update: While I have put up the quote about the characters from one of the Nazca staff, I should also mention that the franchise already has its share of "waifus" long before Ass-tack came out.